We’ve given them no choice: Hartland Tea Party folks will now burn Obamacare — in Hell

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Needs More Fire!

The talented PAC crew from RetakeOurGov (who brought you the Tea Party Express Shit-O-Matic 3000 — a clever device that enabled disgruntled users to take a fake poop on Sen. Harry Reid) had their shovels all ready tonight in Hell to straight up bury into the literal ground (yes, they were really going to do this) the totally unconstitutional Barack Hussein NObamacare in an act of gloating hyperbolic political symbolism. But then this crazy thing happened yesterday: turns out, Nobamacare actually IS constitutional! Talk about a weekend buzzkill — no fun paper burying parties for you I guess, tea partiers.

But wait! Don’t put away your lawn chair and your beer cozy filled with cold delicious Natural Light just yet, real ‘Mericans! The party is still on like Donkey Kong!

“Given that it wasn’t overturned, I wasn’t going to do anything, but people have called me and said, ‘Don’t cancel it. Turn it into a rally,’ ” RetakeOurGov Treasurer Wes Nakagiri said following Thursday’s U.S. Supreme Court ruling. “We’ll still burn the bill. We just won’t be able to bury it.”

Yeah, that is kind of sad that you didn’t get to use the shovels Wes Nakagiri, but YEEEEAHHHHH WOOOOOO! FIRE! LET’S BURN SOME SHIT!

So, in the great tradition of passionate believers who like to burn words they don’t like, the tea partiers have found a way to keep their weekend plans in tact despite the fact that YOU WERE ALL WRONG, according to your OWN GUY IN THE SUPREME COURT HAHAHAHA — WRONG!  you experienced some setbacks, and we have no doubt you will keep the sweet bitterness and rage alive at this evil socialist regime that wants to help sick people from the poor to the middle class afford to get the care they need to get well and stay well. So you keep fighting, and burning words, and fake pooping turds (hey — that rhymes!) to show that you will not go quietly into the night, Tea Partiers — SIC SEMPER TYRANNIS!


About Sally Subterfuge 15 Articles
Sally Subterfuge is a low-down, surly satirist and Sandernista and one-time news reporter who leans left in the reddest county in Michigan. She is still waiting on her George Soros money. Yo, send me a Tweet: https://twitter.com/SubterfugeSally

1 Comment

  1. Woo-hoo! A book burning! Wes and his buddies must be the ones who put the “party” in “Tea Party.” The Founding Fathers would be so proud.

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