Sally Interrupts Your Hump Day for A Brief Yet Stabby Post About How Lady Parts = Higher Car Insurance Rates in MI

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New Study Finds Michigan Women Pay Significantly More for Auto Insurance than Men Because F*ck If I Know

Ladyfriends, seriously what even is this shit?

Apparently a report has been compiled that finds the dude-bro in the pickup with the jerkwad shades and stripper decals who cuts YOU off and gives YOU the finger is paying less for his car insurance than you because YOU have a vagina, or a dead husband – or maybe even both!

We aren’t just talking about couch change here either: “The report found that Progressive and Esurance charged between 10% and 38% more to women than men in Detroit – in one instance nearly $1,000 more annually – despite all drivers tested having a clean record,” WHMI reports.

Michigan’s Coalition Protecting Auto No-Fault (CPAN) released its report today that studied both Brighton and Detroit, and it found even young dudebros —  considered the most dangerous driving demographic of them all with their testosterone and road rageyness — are paying considerably less than women with perfect driving records for their car insurance. Also paying more: widows. Because politicians and auto insurance lobbyists would gladly trample the face of a widow on the street to chase a campaign dollar in this wretched state.

Our very own Lana Thies (R-42nd Dist.) is the Chair of the House Committee on Insurance, and even she’s collected about $82,500 from the Michigan Insurance Coalition  — her top donor by far. But I’m sure all that special interest money that got her elected isn’t going to get in the way of protecting the consumer from this kind of nefarious vagina-based discrimination that Thies kiiiinda thinks might be #fakenews. (of course.)

Meanwhile, we are all making .79 on the dollar to the menfolk, and now we’re being charged more for the little things, like the ability to drive our cars legally. Time to go day drink — with a designated driver, of course!


About Sally Subterfuge 15 Articles
Sally Subterfuge is a low-down, surly satirist and Sandernista and one-time news reporter who leans left in the reddest county in Michigan. She is still waiting on her George Soros money. Yo, send me a Tweet:


    • Sounds like Sam Theis and his attorney need to get on the same page regarding how to spin this so it doesn’t look like such an obvious “flush with cash!” moment for Lana thanks to the insurance lobby.

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