Oh, look everyone — it’s Hamburg Sen. Joe Hune straight up lighting a match on a burn ban day like he’s Judas Priest. Breakin’ the law! Breakin’ the law!
Civil disobediance, amiright people?
Smart Person Henry David Thoreau wrote an essay about that topic once when he was mad about legit things to get mad about like endless war and human enslavement, but words are often boring and sometimes take forever to read. You know what’s a way more fun and exciting thing to do with words you don’t understand and are too impatient to analyze? Burn them into to smoldering ashes of misguided rage against those who give a damn about people with pre-existing conditions and are trying to help them afford medical care.
That’s what Sen. Hune and these embittered olds did here to Obamacare Friday when they decided to torch the new 2,000 page health care law instead of burying it in the ground, which they said they couldn’t do in the interest of mixing metaphors or some weird logic. But in the world of reality where sane people live, it wouldn’t have mattered if they had burned it, or buried it, or turned it into hamster shavings: Obamacare is still so irritatingly constitutional. So go ahead, patriots — pick your crazy metaphoric act of angry symbolism: Light it up! Or bury it! Or — I know — light it up and then bury it! All the matches and shovels in the world won’t change facts.
Hey, here’s an idea for you tea partiers: perhaps you could burn the insurance rebate checks you will also be getting in the mail thanks to socialism. Money is paper too, right? You can show ’em how serious you really are about this fight.
But if you do decide to burn those rebate checks in protest, and I’m sure you are all seriously considering it, please make sure it’s on a legal burn day. You may not give a shit, but some of us don’t want to become the next Waldo Canyon.
Now enjoy this video that I have posted in honor of Joe Hune’s bravery and heroism in risking everyone’s health and safety to break the law so that he might make a principled stand against sick people who have been hosed by insurance companies. Totally metal, bro.