By Chelsea Steinhauser
Livingston County celebrated its third annual PRIDE month on the heels of the executive order signed by Gov. Gretchen Whitmer officially proclaiming June as PRIDE month in the state of Michigan. Across the county, celebrations in Brighton and Howell garnered hundreds of residents in support of the LGBTQ+ community.
As one of the founding members of Queer Families Livingston, a group dedicated to providing safe, family friendly events for the queer community, we hosted the very first PRIDE Prom for local youth. Close to 60 teens participated in the festivities and it was a safe and fun night for both the teens and our volunteers. At a time when tensions are high between some groups, we experienced an amazing show of support from residents and businesses, and Livingston County showed up in a really bigway this year. We were overwhelmed with support from businesses, individual donors, and volunteers.
As a matter of fact, we experienced no negative interactions despite the fear and rhetoric circulating the online community. One of the many resource booths available during the PRIDE festival in downtown Howell is the Conversations of Concern, an opportunity to speak to a member of our team in a safe and non-judgmental space. We offer this opportunity to anyone who is seeking information or understanding. It can be very difficult to have these conversations and we believe it important to have these difficult discussions with all members of the community. It is through these conversations that we find common ground, expand our shared knowledge, and provide support.
These events create a safe and welcoming place for queer youth in our community, and considering the startling data that indicates queer youth are at least FIVE TIMES more likely to succumb to deaths of despair, something as seemingly benign as an inclusive prom can change the trajectory of a young life. Iconic poet and artist Andrea Gibson authored a poem whose title references the very same statistic, and I share an excerpt of it below. The full poem is linked.
“QUEER YOUTH ARE FIVE TIMES MORE LIKELY TO DIE BY SUICIDE”
means:
You lived five times harder than you should have had to
to still have a body when you graduated high school.
means:
Hate worked five times harder
to make your spirit its wishbone.
means:
When your mother asked what was wrong,
you were five times more likely to believe you’d lose
her if you spoke the truth.
means:
You were told five times more often
you’d go to hell when you died.
means:
Burning for eternity seemed five times
more doable than another day in the school lunchroom.
means:
You were five times more inclined
to triple-padlock your diary.
means:
You were five times more likely
to stop writing your story down.
So what is Gibson’s advice to queer youth? “Seek out people who will celebrate you and love you exactly as you are, and because of who you are. I’ve never liked the idea of being loved in spite of who we are.”
That’s what we do at QFL. We celebrate and love people exactly as they are because we know how hard life can be when you feel alone, rejected, misunderstood, or vilified. We are here to support the queer community and bridge the gap of misunderstanding with whomever may have concern that LGBTQ+ people of Livingston County want anything else but to live a life of peace and prosperity- just like everyone else. We truly live in a safe and supportive community that I am proud to raise my family in and I look forward to continued conversations to demonstrate that. Livingston County thrives when we engage with one another in a curious and respectful way. We have so much more in common than we realize.
Conversations of Concern (CoC) is not licensed mental health counseling or therapy.