Bookmark this life: My disappearing universe

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I never regret anything. Because every little detail of your life is what made you into who you are in the end.~ Drew Barrymore

How was your summer getaway?

The collector: Sorting through my universe...
The collector: Sorting through my universe…discovering relics

Almost everyone you talk to says the same thing. We’re all so busy. Of course summer’s the time for the usual graduation parties, outdoor weddings and concerts, garage sales, church barbecues, family reunions, every-which-festival-you-can-think-of, and sundry things that we all associate with summer.

My family was no exception to this pattern of activity. July was mid-summer event-full – not lazy, hazy at all – and just a little bit crazy. All things family converged in a huge way. This is a marker summer; and I need to bookmark it, with so much transpiring in the whirlwind of time, so much to reflect on – when I get a few moments.

Honestly, though, I think it’s my life I’d better bookmark. My universe is disappearing fast, and I need to hang on for the ride.

I’ve gotten the impression that I’m not the only one who feels caught up in a spinning vortex. I’m not talking about the polar one from last winter, either, although I’m sure that contributed to the feeling of days disappearing. Maybe we’re experiencing the after-effects of that long, harsh, bitter winter… hoping that summer days will be around awhile.

No matter. I’m bookmarking the details of this summer, so I can revisit them. I will, of course. Being a writer means that reflecting on life events is a natural state of existence. I got caught up in the details of the weeks of summer, for sure. It’s only now that I’m letting go – purposely creating space for myself to pause and reflect. I’m bookmarking this time, this season of being at another crossroad. At least, I sense that’s what’s going on.

It seems odd that things converged this particular summer. I’d been aware of upcoming changes: daughter and son-in-law entering the reality stage of their decade-long planned adventure of living on their boat; son and fiancée engaged to be married next summer and busily making plans; father-in-law contemplating his own life changes and possible move (or not); and a good friend of his generation enduring a personal health struggle all year. I know there’s a shift coming.

Then there’s me: I have things to do, choices to make, goals to set, plans to create, projects to fulfill.

Somehow, though, everything in that last sentence seemed to hinge on getting through the summer vortex. Somehow, everything in that sentence is naturally connected to all those marker events. Retirement party for Marine son-in law, family reunion, shopping for wedding gown and arranging for destination wedding, husband’s job schedule, father-in-law’s Michigan presence – all whirled and swirled through the weeks of summer.

Yes, now it’s time for a big bookmark. This summer of 2014 requires some examination. It’ll take some heart input and maybe a dream or two, as summer butts up against autumn and the seasonal shift toward thoughts of putting your house in order begins. And, I have much to put in order. Many things need reflection and doing something about.

Hmmm. The other day, I found myself realizing I’d put on a favorite old tee my mom had given me. Even though time has shrunk it – rather, enlarged me – I smiled when I discovered it. I’d loved the lemon color and the unique design, hemmed as though the outside was the inside.

I remember liking that my mom picked out something a bit out of the ordinary. Quirky never seemed her style. I smiled again, thinking about my attachment to certain pieces of clothing. It takes a lot for me to decide to give away something I’ve loved, unless it absolutely doesn’t fit, or is outrageously out of style.

That inside-out tee reflects me right now, somehow.

Seeing the movie Guardians of the Galaxy plunged me deeper into end-of-summer contemplation and inside-outness. I felt pummeled during that film experience. Indeed, sometimes, I feel like I’m on a journey back and forth between the far sides of the galaxy. I suppose age puts us into this perspective.

The memories from my old yellow tee come back…the fun times wearing it. A collector’s item for the soul. My future daughter-in-law pointed out The Collector in the movie. She’s into all-things-movies. That was the second time she’s seen the film; and she was focusing on The Collector character.

I’m not sure about him, but I can relate. He may be collecting on a galactic scale, but I have my own galaxy to contend with. It’s not a pretty picture. My goal, though, is to make it so.

End of summer. Time to get going with the seasonal inclination to sift through that galactic collection and all those little details – like my yellow tee – that maybe played a part in my life, maybe influenced who I am.

Toss? Or regroup? Let me think. Well, perhaps if I’m not yet ready to give up this little detail, I can create something new. I can at least recycle it, make it into a pillow…and eventually a good cotton rag for dusting all the rest of my collection.

The question is, will I get around to it? But what is time in my disappearing universe? Guess I’ll bookmark that thought and get back to it tomorrow. If I’m not too busy.

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Susan G Parcheta dreamed of being an inspirational writer, even as heading off after college to a teaching job. While teaching was not her passion, words were -- writing many years for Livingston newspapers, especially in the areas of education, health and wellness. The dream continues: to inspire creative, healthy living and to explore new concepts of body, mind, spirit. Her signature theme “All Things Beautiful” invites you to embrace the beauty and imagine the possibilities that life has to offer.